


I'll Love the World Like I Should

by WellGoodLuckWithThat



Category: EastEnders (TV)
Genre: Brotherly Love, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Stuart is a dick but then he is not
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-25
Updated: 2020-02-25
Packaged: 2021-02-28 03:29:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,101
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22887100
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WellGoodLuckWithThat/pseuds/WellGoodLuckWithThat
Summary: Struggling to hear properly after the boat crash, Ben is desperate to find Callum.Tumblr Prompt: “What about a Ballum fic where Ben finds Callum in that warehouse after the boat disaster?”
Relationships: Callum "Halfway" Highway/Ben Mitchell
Comments: 3
Kudos: 132





	I'll Love the World Like I Should

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, so this was my first Ballum prompt and my first ever Ballum fic. It’s also been a WHILE since I’ve written anything, but I’ve fallen in love with these two and fancied giving it a go. Please do send me prompts on Tumblr (well-good-luck-with-that) and if I feel like I can do it justice I will most certainly have a crack at it. 
> 
> Prompt: “What about a Ballum fic where Ben finds Callum in that warehouse after the boat disaster?”

Ben scrunches his eyes up tight and opens them again, begging them to readjust the swimming lines that are swamping his vision and making him dizzy. He’s cold... no... he’s _freezing _. But he can’t go home. Not until he finds Callum.__

__He stares helplessly across the square, feeling lost and disoriented as though he hasn’t spent his entire life living in this patch of land. His woollen coat sticks wetly to his shoulders, and if he didn’t have the weight of the world on them, it certainly felt like it. Ben stood and let out an anguished sob, once again blinking away dirty water mixed with salty tears. The ringing in his ears is persistent and drilling, and he isn’t sure if it’s from the knock to his head or insanity that he can faintly make out the sound of someone calling his name.__

____As it turns out, it is neither of those options. “Ben!” The voice doesn’t belong to Callum. In the back of his mind Ben knows how he must look - standing in the middle of Albert Square, drenched through and sobbing uncontrollably, but he doesn’t care. “Ben! Are you okay!?” He thinks the voice asks, but all he can think about is Callum’s cold skin and blue lips and oh God it’s happened again and it’s all his fault and-..._ _ _ _

____“Ben. Listen to me.” Jay’s concerned face swims into view in front of Ben’s sodden body, and a steady hand rests on his shoulder. “Mate, what the hell happened? I saw the ambulances and Denise was saying Jack pulled ya’ from the Thames and I ain’t even seen Callum-...”_ _ _ _

____“Callum.” Jay is interrupted as soon as he utters the other man’s name. “Jay, we need’ta… we need’ta find Callum.” Ben tells him, pressing his own hands into his friend’s arms to demonstrate his urgency. He’s ignoring the fact that he can’t really hear his own voice, but it’s not important._ _ _ _

____“Find Callum? What ya’ on about? Ben, why would we need’ta find him?” Jay asked in confusion, needing someone to fill him in on what on earth had occurred in the past few hours that’s caused Ben’s current state. “What we need is ta’ get you inta’ something dry, mate.” He tells his friend, taking in his chattering teeth with a worried glance._ _ _ _

____“No!” Ben cries, pushing Jay’s body away from his weakly. He sobs again as he presses his palms against his ringing ears. He’s vaguely aware above the sirens clouding his mind that Jay is trying to take him home. “Keanu took Callum and I need to find him.”_ _ _ _

____“Keanu took Callum? Ya’ mean he kidnapped him?” Jay exclaims, unable to contain his utter confusion at everything that was taking place. Ben just ignored him, staring blankly into the dark night as though he could find Callum by just willing him there. Jay shook his head. No matter what had happened, his friend was in no state to go looking for Callum (and potentially a fight if Keanu was still involved). “Ben. Listen to me.” He shakes Ben’s arm to get his attention when the other boy ignores him again. “Ben. You are no use ta’ Callum like this.” He states loudly, aware now that Ben clearly had lost his hearing aid during his dip into the Thames. Ben blinks his watery eyes at Jay. “We need ta’ get ya’ home and dry. We can search for Callum first thing tomorrow.” He demands, ignoring the whimpering protest Ben makes in response. Deep down, Ben knew he was right. He was no use to Callum like this. “Come on, mate, let’s get you home.” Jay gently pushes Ben to start walking, wrapping an arm around his sobbing brothers’ shoulders. No matter what happened tomorrow, Ben Mitchell had a lot of explaining to do._ _ _ _

____ _ _

____< >_ _ _ _

____“I don’t know, Stuart, he just said he was missing!” Jay hisses at the older Highway brother, who was currently stomping back and forth through the Beale living room like an ogre._ _ _ _

____“What does that mean, ‘missing’!?” Stuart snarls back, baring his teeth like an angry Rottweiler. “I knew him getting involved with a Mitchell was a bad idea, and now look.” Stuart’s fury radiated off his body in waves as he spat at Jay. “If my little brother’s dead because of _him_ , I’ll kill him me’self.” He warns, the hint of a promise glistening in his grey eyes. ___ _

______Jay scowled at him. “We don’t know why Keanu kidnapped Callum right now, so maybe lay off threatening Ben until after we’ve found him?” He snapped back, unable to shake the feeling that Ben had definitely done _something_ to piss off Keanu. Jay loved his adopted brother, but he’d be the first to say he was no saint. Still, family’s family, and until Stuart has concrete reason to threaten Ben’s life, Jay was fighting his corner. ___ _ _ _

________“Shirley will know where he is.” Ben’s determined but croaky voice muttered as he entered the room, one arm still being shoved through a worn grey hoodie; worn many a time by Callum on a run if Jay remembers correctly. “Dad made Keanu tell her. Issa’ a start.” He tells them hoarsely, his throat clearly clogged with whatever crap runs through the London river._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Stuart moves to press Ben up against the pictures of smiling Beale family members on the wall when Jay steps forward to push him back. “Look, we’ve got a lead, yeah?” He starts, eyeing Stuart who looks all but ready to tear Ben to pieces. “Ben’s in no state to fight ya’, Stuart, and the most important thing is we find Callum, okay? Let’s talk to Shirley.” Jay looks at the bigger man pointedly, as if to usher him out of the door first. He wasn’t leaving him behind to walk with Ben._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Fine.” Stuart relents. “But I’m telling you this ain’t over, and once I’ve got Callum back there’ll be hell to pay, Mitchell.” The brute snaps, pressing a doughy finger into a disorientated Ben’s chest._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________ _ _ _ _ _ _

________< >_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Callum!?” Ben bellows into the deserted warehouse, his voice echoing off the dusty walls and causing a scattering of pigeons to swiftly vacate. “Callum? Where are ya!?” He calls out, his throat as rough as sandpaper. Ben’s eyes well up with tears when he realises that even if Callum were to respond, it is unlikely he would be able to hear his cries. “Callum, please.” He whispers brokenly, as though Stuart and Jay aren’t right behind him and able to see him at his most vulnerable._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Jay comes up behind him and rests a gentle hand on Ben’s shoulder, forcing the other man to look at his lips. “Ben. We will find him.” He had long since realised that Ben still couldn’t hear very much at all, but it was futile trying to get his brother to explain further. Not when he was so torn up at the loss of his boyfriend._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Callum!? Callum, mate, it’s ya’ brother!” Stuart thunders, thrashing around the warehouse like a madman as he pulls tarpaulin and scrap metal from the rubble around them. “Yell if you can hear ‘us!” The three men stop in hopeful silence as the wind whistles through the airy storehouse, and Jay shivers as he pulls his coat further around his waist. God help Callum if he had been stuck here for a week. “Cal!? Callum!?” Stuart continues to roar as he frantically looks for any sign of his brother._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Jay stops suddenly. “Hang on!” He yells, flapping his arms over to Stuart. “Stuart, shut up for a minute will ya’!?” He tells him, lifting his ear to the wind and following the direction of what could only be described as a cry for help. Once Ben realises Jay has heard something, he charges towards the metal staircase leading further into the dark rubbish tip. He looks to Jay for confirmation. “Yes!” Jay tells him. “Sounds like that way.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Ben clambers down the stairs, not even looking to see what might be at the bottom. “Callum!?” He yells into the black. Recognising again with frustration that he would not be able to hear even if Callum did respond, Ben treads carefully towards the open doorway covered by thin sheets of filthy plastic. He pushes them open and watches as his breath washes away into the cold air. “Callum…” He breathes as he see’s his boyfriend, stretched out and damaged in the rubble below._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Holy shit!” Jay exclaims as he nearly walks headfirst through the very same hole Callum did days previously. “We have to find a way ta’ get ta’ him… Ben! Ben what are ya’ doing!?” Jay yells as Ben starts a rocky descent into the scrap, using a few loose bricks as holdalls before jumping the rest of the height onto the floor._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Ben grimaces as his ankle rolls, but all he can think about is Callum. He rushes to his side and touches his hands. “Callum. Callum… it’s me… it’s Ben. I’m so sorry…” He stutters, tears already wetting his cheeks. Callum’s skin is ice cold. Ben takes off his coat and drapes it over his lover’s body, before taking his face in his hands. “Callum, please. Ya’ have ta’ be okay.” Ben cries as he pushes Callum’s dusty hair away from his bloodied face._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Callum groans underneath him and brings a hand up to rest on Ben’s thigh. “Knew… you’d…come.” He whispers, voice sounding infinitely worse than Ben’s. Ben watches the words form shapes across Callum’s lips._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Where are ya’ hurt, Cal? Stuart and Jay have rung for an ambulance. You’re gonna be just fine, see?” Ben tells him, cradling him as if he were a precious jewel that could break at any moment._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“We’re gonna get you out of here, okay Cal? Don’t be scared, yeah?” Stuart calls down from the ledge, waiting anxiously with Jay for the paramedics to get to them._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Cal. Callum… listen.” Ben starts, focusing on the pair of bright blue eyes in front of him. “I should’ve said it before… at Christmas… I felt it then and I should’ve told you and I’m so sorry that I didn’t-“_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Shh.” Callum whispers, pressing a weak finger to Ben’s lips. “I know, Ben.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“I love you.” Ben responds firmly, his hands running through Callum’s natural hair._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“I know.” Callum manages a weak smile. His eyes shine through the layers of dust and dirt surrounding him. “I love you too.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Ben huffs out a wet laugh, tears still streaming down his cheeks out of relief and fear._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Do you think you could just let Ben have this one? He’s suffered enough.” Jay says to Stuart in a hushed voice, his own eyes slightly damp at seeing his brother and his friend in such a distressed state. “He didn’t mean for this ta’ happen. Anyone can see how much he loves Cal.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Stuart is quiet for a moment. “Look, I ain’t blind. Any man and is’ dog can see Ben loves Callum. And God knows it shines outta’ Callum like the damn sun.” Stuart chuckles despite himself. “As long as he’s okay. That’s all I want. I just want him to be okay.” He mutters, looking down at his battered baby brother._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Let’s just… get Callum back up on his feet and we can go from there then, deal?” Jay asks hopefully, truly just wishing the best for his best friend._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Stuart is quiet for a moment more as he stares at his brother and his boyfriend. He takes in the cut across Callum’s cheek and the dust settled into his skin. He takes in Ben’s hands on either side of his head and the relieved smile he has on his face as he stares at Callum like he hung the moon. He takes in the gentleness he see’s in the usually stoic shorter man’s eyes, and then he looks at Callum’s face again. Callum is _beaming_. Sure, he too has tears of relief streaming down his face. He has bruises forming on both eye sockets, and dried blood is caked under his nose (Keanu is going to die for this). Yet, Callum is beaming at Ben. He’s smiling as Ben tells him it’s all going to be okay, and he has his fists grabbing hold of Ben’s shirt as if trying to convince himself that he is real. As he watches Callum and Ben create their own beam of light for each other in a place like this, in a situation like this, he considers Jay’s offer. And yeah, he supposes it’s a deal.___ _ _ _ _ _

__________Ben Mitchell can have this one._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________< >_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _


End file.
